LMFAO Okay. Forget I said that. HE IS A FUCKING NUTCASE. XD

Wow, it's been fo'eva' since I've written anything here. I IZ ALIVE, AH SWEARS. And I've been reading all your journals. I just don't comment because I'm a lazy prick... Anywho...

So... This isn't an assured thing yet, but for a long time mom has been wanting to move out to North Carolina, to be with my sister. Now she's thinking of maybe moving there in May, when the lease here runs out. It's somewhat of an ultimatum for me. Basically I'd be moving to Flagstaff permanently, then, in the spring, and getting an apartment I mostly plan on staying in until I graduate. Which means hell to the no to fuckin' shared living. Uh-uuuh. I'd be taking Buster with me, and mom would take Kermit. I hope that doesn't fuck with Kermit's psyche...Buster is fine on his own, but I dunno. And bleh, Buster being an outdoor cat is going to be difficult in Flagstaff, since then I can't let him out during the winter, and he cries and cries and scratches at everything and UNG. XD I know that's seriously trivial, but I already see my security deposit fleeting before my eyes. I'm going to miss stupid Ethan-face... Hopefully he'll visit me a lot. Muuurrrrrrr.

That's really...all there is to my life right now. Nothing's happening... I'm understanding the math this time, though, wee for meeee. I should do decently this semester. I GOT A PELL GRANT. HUZZAH FOR ME. Why? I...have no idea. But...BUT YAY, MONEY. :D I can almost pay for all my tuition with it. Woots. I'm not really sure what to do about financial aid for the following years, though, since I don't pay taxes... I mean, hopefully I'll be getting a job, and mom will show me how to fill out my tax forms. I guess we'll worry about that later.

I've been selling more stuff, woo! It's very intermittent, but I'll just take everything with me, and continue to try and make some random cash off it up there.

....YEAH, STUFF.

Everything is so weird now. I don't even know if I have the energy to
question it. I'm just kinda going with the flow. But it is so...so
weird. Out of place, out of character. I don't get it. It feels like
someone else is using my body to run my life. In other news:





...Can't...stop...playing...

It's hilarious how Ethan and I are polar opposites, on just about every major topic, yet we get along so well. I lurb his stupid butt.

Awyeyah, G-Master F.

Also, hm, it seems there has been a change of plansssss. I'm now going to Charlotte instead of San Francisco. Unfortunately it won't be for as long as I'd wanted, but it was apparently the cheapest flight. I just used the money I paid on the other ticket to credit toward it, but it had a $150 reissue fee. D: We figured that'd be cheaper than paying for food for a month on my own, though, lawllawl. I should clarify it's because my sister lives there, so I'd stay with her. Dude, the changes with Foamy over the years is really strange. I'd not been watching him for several years, and wow... I first found him back in 2002, but stopped watching around '05...and Germaine...woh... And wtf, Mutie?!

I'm so god damned tired. ...I feel so damn weird lately. Like a part of me has changed completely and I have no idea why or how.

( AHHH CAPITALS. )

HA. I bought my ticket, suckas. I'm outta here on the 23rd, for a month, biatches.

Dude, wtf....my stomach and chest have been hurting all god damn day. I'm really so bored. Classes are a vague distraction at least. They tend to drone, but make the week go by. I sold something else, woo. I really need something to do. I'm trying to work on my story for cw in the fall. Carol said some of the same people from my spring class will be there; that'll be funny. ...Ooh, joy, the pain's spreading to my back! I dunno. Nothing's happening. My mom keeps asking if I need the morning after pill and it doesn't seem to matter how many times I tell her no, she always brings it up...even when she says she'll stop. Sigh.

CLEARLY yaoi is the cornerstone that BRINGS PEOPLE TOGETHER. *has a bunch of friends from yaoi_daily* I BELIEVE I AM SEEING A TREND HERE.

Carry on with your silly jabberwalkie.

Woots. Since 2006, I've lost 30lbs and kept it off. Yes, that's a long time...but...meh.

Iaaannn left meeeee...D: Stupid...having class at EIGHT FRIGGIN' THIRTY IN THE MORNING. Who fuckin'...WHO LEARNS AT THAT HOUR? I am dead to the world until at least 11. But it was a nice visit, at least. I am going to try and seeeee him again this summer. AND YOU TOO WIFEY, YOU'D BEST BE PREPARED. D<

Mom was finally able to get a nice, dark sheet to stay up on my window. Ahhh, soooo much nicer, mmm. Now it isn't drenched in OMG BRIGHT HEAT for hours. Now I can maybe get to bed earlier for class. Fuckin'...biology, ffff... At least English and pilates are at night.

I'm not sure I've been this happy in a long, long time. My life is amazing right now. Yay.

Ahahaha! I finally found it again. Don't smoke pot, kids. You'll wind up making out with the wrong people.

Wow, so...A CONUNDRUM. Though...in all honesty, not really a conundrum, because it's pretty damn awesome. I'm just not sure..if it'll work for the fall, because with Phoenix college I'll only have to take two math classes instead of three up at NAU. But! My uncle is offering to pay for my schooling for the rest of the time I'm up there! Dude wtf. Well, he said the living expenses, and I borrow for tuition. But that takes my mom off the hook. She said she wasn't going to borrow anymore, so I would have to do it, and find a job up there. Which is fine, really, I mean...I was going to do that, after this year. But hot damn, wtf! Friggin' 'mazin'. I love having rich relatives. XD It's kinda weird, though...he never offered that to my sister... But it's probably, as my mom said, because she was way more independent, and working while in school. He's only doing this so I get the 'college experience' of being at one college the entire time, and, like, getting to know my professors and...stuff. Whooboy... I need to e-mail him, and see if it's possible to do it for the spring, because that'd work out better. Since I'd need to find a roommate pretty short notice. I was going to room, maybe, with Michael when I got back, but...I'm pretty sure his lease isn't up for at least a year. Maybe I'll just go back to the same apartments, I dunno. It'd be nice to find something a little cheaper, though.

WOOHOO.

The only reservation I have is damnit I was finally going to maybe have people to hang out with again, at least for a little while. XD I know that might be stupid, if you think about me not having to have loans...but...I dunno...I missed all you peeps. I'll still be here for the summer, though! And if I stay for the fall, then damnit all, you all better hang with me at some point!

Also, I've sold two things now! And I barely started listing things on Tuesday! Woot. Who knows how fast I can maybe get this stuff outta heah...and get some cash-ola.

I'm moving back to the big P, for a year, to take more gen ed classes at PC. ...Joy. But loans are some crazy shit, ya'll, and I might as well get basic classes out of the way. Parks and Rec is pretty kickin', though, so I still plan on coming back here to get my degree. I took a Wilderness First Aid class, and I'm now certified for three years. Iffin' you get in trouble Phoenix peeps, I CAN SAVE YOU. Unless, you know...a giant bear bites off your leg at the hip, which was Mike's proposed situation to me. I mean...you know...I'd have to apply a tourniquet and HELICOPTER EVAC YOU. Else you SOL. :D Oh, and my lease DOES run out in April. She...must have been showing me Ally's lease..for some reason.

Dude. The bloody hell. What is up with paypal and these phantom purchases? I was refunded for the first one, and I'd better be refunded for this second one, or I'm gonna flip a bitch.

Also, my lease runs out at the end of August? Wh-at the...heck... Both my mom and I were POSITIVE it was April...

Ya know, it's a good thing I know how to unlock doors. Ally keeps locking me out of the bathroom. Silly fucker.

Also, follow mah blog iffin' ya wan' see mah photos, fools.


http://thechairmanswaltz.blogspot.com/

This is actually the first time I've ever had the ending to a story worked out before the damn middle... It's only 30 pages right now, too. Fah. I'm thinkin', if I can pump up the volume middle, I can get it to be either a short story, or novella, depending on how much plot I need to shove in to get rid of those GAPING HOLES it has right now. Sheeesh. But oh, joo will be surprised by da end. 'Cept Nikol cause she already knows. Hurrrrr. I really want to try my hand at publishing it. I don't know, at that length, how far it would spread, or if I could only manage a journal (Pssshhh and that's assuming I even have a shot.). I guess I just want the irony factor. Seriously, that's the only reason I'm pushing to publish. XD 

Man. My eyes hurt. I've been staring at computer screens for waaayyy too long and been awake for way too long. Fuckin'...fuck.

Well, okay. Sweet. Thanks, Ally. And to think, I really didn't think you could be any more of a bitch. Apparently you feel the need to scream at me and treat me like I'm five, over something that I not only didn't do, but it's fucking clear that you're lying just to make it sound like people are backing you up. You know, you should be damned thankful that I have a fear of the police, because I would have ended these petty fights MY way a long time ago. I'm passive for a reason, you know. Not because you scare me. Oh, no, quite the opposite. I don't know what your fucking deal is, but you'd best lay off. I'm moving out in April, May at the latest, and I won't ever have to see your face again.

In other news, due to crazy lack of sleep, this bullshit added onto it kinda made me start freaking out in my delirium. Behind closed doors, but...when that starts happening, I start babbling to people I don't want to babble to about things I really wish I hadn't said after I stop talking. That would happen with my mom a lot, during our arguments. But now of course it's Mike. Fuck. I hate being such a god damn girl around him. Now he's probably like, oh shit what did I get myself into... Fuck. Just. :C

I've been drawing recently. Feels nice.

I ran into CJ a few days ago. That was really weird. And he's exactly the same as when he was 14 and I moved away. Lawl. It's like I never left. Kinda makes it tough to talk to him, though, because I guess I've just changed a little. Or I must not have noticed as much when I was 14. He's super judgmental, too, which is...somewhat annoying. In a way where I just want to tell him to chill the fuck out, and that it seriously doesn't matter. Not of me, but of everyone else around us. Dude, chill pill, srsly, hurrhurr.

I heard from my dad a few weeks back. Gasp. He's alive! Out of jail now. He's tryin' to get a job. He wants to see me, and to myself I'm like, aw crap....noooo... I dunno, after four years, I just feel like, eh...ehhhhhh...no thanks. I'll e-mail you, I guess, but I'm not too keen on you visiting me and thinking you can just go back to how it was. Which wasn't that great. But you're crazy in denial. And forgot how old I was, because you didn't believe me that it'd been four years, hawhaw. Whatev', we'll see how that goes. But I can feel myself gritting my teeth when I said I love you on the phone to him. I find it's just a mechanism to keep him from killing himself, but I can't say I honestly feel that way. I haven't in years. Nor have I particularly even noticed your absence. Except that it was a ton quieter at home.

Jenni finally has a phone and got in contact with me! I'm not even gonna bother trying to figure out what the fuck the deal was before. We're just gonna act like it didn't happen. Hurray, Jenni-face.

ANDREA OMG I MISS YOU. I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR ADDRESS IS OMG WTF I WANT TO WRITE YOU. Maybe Chris only posted it on his journal...hm...

FFFFFRGHHH...